I was in eighth standard when my Dad (who works in a PSU bank) used to tell me about auditors coming to bank and being treated like kings and, that was my first introduction to the world of CA (Chartered Accountants). And then and there I had decided what I had to do and then had started the series of fascination of a beautiful and interesting future.
Next when my twelfth class ended I was all set to give my first shot at being “The Revered” CA. I gave the entrance exam and wohaaa I cleared it with distinction. People congratulated as if I had done a unique job, and I, I was on top of the world, feeling as if I had won the First World War. Now dreams started that I will go to office, own multiple formals, have my own cabin, attend meetings, will earn MY money and spend it as I wish.
Day of entry to the office, dreams shattered. It was nothing corporate; forget about a separate cabin, the complete office was fitted into a cabin. Dreams of meetings, I didn’t even had time to meet my family and friends. People enjoyed their college life, for me it was a big problem handling it along with office and coaching classes. My day started and 5 am and I left home around 5:30-6am and entered back home at 8-9pm. Every day same routine, not for a week, a month, a year, but for 3 ½ huge years. As for money, I should not expose my profession, but the amount to be paid per month to trainees (articles as we are called) is less than the daily wages of a labourer, and we work 6 days a week for 9-10 hours, (which extends to 12-13 hours for two months in the year, during our peak period of work). Then we also need to give our exams which are renowned for their level of difficulty, and for that you literally have to beg for leave from office from your boss, which though is granted for at maximum a month but requires you to eat your ego and self respect and literally cry and beg in front of your boss and which he in the end grants as a mercy to you. Still time went by with many bittersweet memories.
Then came the second set of exams which I gave in two groups. Cleared the first group in first attempt and voila I was again up to the sky, flying away, forgetting all the pains and problems of reaching there. When the second group came, I tasted my first failure of life and it pained, it surely did. But when you have your friends along, the pain subsides and you get the strength to work again. Time flew by, exams finished and the result day came. This time it was a green signal and a big party time. World War two also finished finally.
Half battle won, now only left with the last set of exams. World War three and man it was dreadful. It involved loads and loads of sleepless nights and tiring classes (in which we slept). Again gave the exams in two sets and again got success in the first group in first attempt. But as it is said, history repeats itself and so did it. I again failed in the second group and this time it was trauma. Not because of failure but because of fear of studying all those books again. We had a terrible time. A friend of mine (who I know will understand when she will read this one) was with me during this journey. This journey of ours was full of dreams as well as hard work. We cried together, laughed together, studied together, dreamt together. Exams went by well and we were hoping for our luck to work, which holds an extremely important place in CA exams. Now the wait for the dreaded results lead to weaving of new dreams in our hearts. Finally study will be over, we will get into our dream jobs and earn( no mint) money like anything and we will spend those green and red leaves of money as if actual leaves flow with the wind…(You feel this is getting over the board, then no we actually wanted to shop like hell). Corporate lives, two vacations a year, our due Goa trip (for which we have planned a zillion times), loads of shopping, exotic luncheons and dinners. Then came the much awaited result day. We both were in a job interview for one of our dream companies on the result day. Being separated from our family and from each other in that procedure, I saw the result on my phone sitting alone in that room, waiting to be called for my interview while she was sitting in a bus returning to her home place after her interview. As soon as I saw the result on my phone, I was called in for the interview. I couldn’t scream in happiness, I couldn’t hug anyone, I couldn’t cry with happiness, I couldn’t even inform my family and friends that the battle has been won, World War three is over. Waited for that round to finish, I found a single acquaintance friend of mine and she hugged me congratulating me for my success, but I still longed for the feeling of being congratulated by loved ones. I called my companion of this war, my dear friend and we literally shouted on the phones, I am a CA, we were the newly crowned CAs and we were loving it. Interviews got finished, results came and I was rejected. The feeling of happiness got somewhere submerged as I got to know the truth that I was still not worth that job, my dream job. Family members chided my disappointment saying that many more opportunities will come, this was one job, there are many out there. You are qualified professional now and now there’s no looking back Happiness again came back, I was joyous. Congratulations messages and calls flowed in. Facebook wall full of wishes. My parents and brother boasted of me. People who never even knew I were also living in that house came and congratulated me as if was the new selected minister from the vicinity. People looked at me with a new respect. My views were now considered important. So much happiness that all the pains of training, studying, that monotonous routine, those failures, everything was forgotten.
Its been four months since me qualifying and I’m still jobless and so is my dear friend. Getting frustrated each day, that was all that pain and struggle of five years worth it??? Has it been the biggest wrong decision of my life??? Will it always be a regret that we chose this course?? College mates who enjoyed those years when we CA students slogged our asses out, are well employed and earning well and we are looking for jobs endlessly. Juniors from school who are still doing B.Tech from not so very reputed colleges are also already placed through their campus and we who are among the few qualified professionals are still waking up aimlessly every day and lazing our day out and sleeping again dissatisfied. Though this journey has given me the world’s best friends for which I will always be thankful. But still the basic need is not being fulfilled, there are no jobs out there, and there’s no fun waiting every day, hoping to listen to some good news.
Family members and friends console that this is your time, enjoy yourself. You have worked very hard for many years, now have a relaxed time. You will get jobs, such processes take time, have patience. But how to make them understand that it is easier said than done. Its very difficult to get up every day with nothing to do, logging in 10 times a day to check if you have got any important mail. Passing the day with TV, oversleeping, facebook (on which I log in 20 times a day, just to see that there’s no activity there also. It feels as if no one other than me has time to log in and idle away on fb also).
Though I sound like the world’s biggest pessimist in this post, still trying my level best to keep patience and faith and wait for this fourth world war to end too. Waiting for the day, when I will again be so happy that I will forget these days also and will once again feel on the top of the world.